writing

 

Ya’ll… this writing thing is crazy. Like a part of my soul. It’s who I am deep down. I’m a writer. I may not be good at it. It may never be my profession, but I can’t get away from it. My soul calls out to the keyboard. I must write. But the problem is, I haven’t been writing.

For two years, I have not written a word. In 2016-2017 I wrote a novel, I had a failed attempt at a website (more my issues, than any other), and we had a family crisis that insisted I not spend hours a day dreaming of being a writer, but that I actually did something that brought in money, you know… so we could eat and such. However, no matter how far I have run away from writing, my soul aches for it. My fingers long to punch the keys. My ears long to hear the clicks as I pour my heart out, (wow, that was super dramatic), but I have pushed it away like it was a poison. Like it was going to lead me down a bad path that I could escape from. But why?

Have you ever had something that you just LOVED to do? No matter what it was, if it wasn’t part of your daily or weekly routine you felt off. Maybe it’s your job. Maybe it’s your Bible study. Maybe it’s the gym. Whatever it is for you, that is writing for me. The problem was for a few years I decided I was going to be a professional writer. That I was going to make a living writing. Nothing wrong with goals and aspirations at all. I am here for it. The problem became that as I put that pressure on my self to make a sizeable income with writing, I lost the joy and love for it.

There are two things wrong with this idea. One, very few people actually make a sizeable income writing. Many author’s do well, some VERY well, but few people get into writing to be billionaires. (That used to be millionaires, but JK Rowling screwed that up for everyone. Now we know you can be a billionaire from writing.) Logically, I knew that was not the future in front of me, but I used to be a teacher… I’m not looking for millions. The second problem was I no actual idea how to accomplish this other that submit article after article to magazines, newspapers, Facebook pages, etc. That is where my attempt at the website came in. I was going to monetize and be one of those blogger/influencers that run the world! The only problem is I’m not great a self-promotion. There in lies the rub. So I quit. I walked away from writing to “focus on my family.”

The thing is though, I can still do that, focusing on my family, and write. I sat down the other day thinking about writing and realized, why do I have to make money at it? Why can’t I simply write to write? Why can’t I get my feelings out and share them with the world (or the five people who actually will read it)? So, that is what I am doing. I feel like I have made this declaration before. Probably if you scroll down a little you will see another article on this exact same topic. I like to be consistent.

So, I’m following my passion. Not to rule the world with it, but because it’s who I was designed to be. What I do know is that God can take anything and bless it. Maybe one day I will actually make money putting pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), but for now, it’s for me, Read along if you would like, or find something for you. Follow your passions. Follow your heart. You usually can’t go wrong.